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• Teacher: Can anyone give me the name of a liquid that won't freeze ? 
  Pupil: Hot water !

• Teacher: Does anyone know which month has 28 days ?
  Pupil: All of them !

• Why was the head teacher worried ?
  Because there were so many rulers in the school !

• Teacher: I told you to stand at the end of the line ?
  Pupil: I tried, but there was someone already there !

• Teacher: If I bought a hundred current buns for a dollar, what would each bun be ?
  Pupil: Stale !

• Teacher: I said to draw a cow eating some grass but you've only drawn the cow ?
  Pupil: Yes, the cow ate all the grass !

• Teacher: What is "can't" short for ?
  Pupil: Can not miss.

• Teacher: and what is "don't" short for
  Pupil: Doughnut !

• Teacher: Can anyone tell me what the Dog Star is ?
  Pupil: Lassie !

• Teacher: In 1940, what were the Poles doing in Russia ?
  Pupil: Holding up the telegraph lines !

• Teacher: Why are you standing on your head ?
  Pupil: I'm just turning over things in my mind, sir !

• Teacher: That's quite a cough you have there, what are you taking for it ?
  Pupil: I don't know teacher. What will you give me ?

• The Mighty Big Book of School Jokes
  by Craig Yoe

• Back-to-School Belly Busters : And Other Side-Splitting Knock-Knock Jokes That Are Too Cool for School!
  by Katy Hall (Author), Stephen Carpenter (Illustrator)

• Jokes You Shouldnt Tell Your Teacher
  by Eric Arnold (Author), Sean Taggart (Illustrator)

• Teachers Jokes Quotes And Anecdotes
  by Stark Books

• Mad Student Survival Guide For Those Bored Of Education
  by Inc. Scholastic

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