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School One Liner Jokes. If you have some that you especially like and you don't see it here. Drop us an email.
School One-Liners
- We used to call it "recess." Today they call it "cease fire."
- The Bible Studies course has been recently changed to "Theories in Mass Hypnosis 101." Surprisingly no one seems to have noticed.
- College would be great if it weren't for all the classes.
- I’m failing geometry because I refuse to believe that pie are squared.
- Someone died of a brain aneurism today while taking a standardized test. The last thing anyone saw him do was stand up, pull all his hair out and yell, “ABACADABA!! ABACADABA!!!!”
- I think I’ll skip English tomorrow. There are just certain aspects of Moby I don’t want to know about.
- The school board decided to remove speech and debate from the course schedule; there was no argument.
- Our school is very low-budgeted; our physics book is so out of date the last chapter deals with combustion.
- School is just an elaborate plot by vampires to obtain the blood of teenagers through periodic blood-drives.
- Today in Art class we were going to paint a nude model, but the teacher sent her to the office for violating dress code.
- Fifth graders in Texas are using worms to recycle garbage from school lunches. But even the worms won't eat the Salisbury steak.
- Today in English we learned absolutely nothing about killing mockingbirds.
- I went to a tough high school. In biology we used to dissect custodians.
- To be a first-grade teacher you have to have skill, dedication, and an immunity to knock-knock jokes.
- School is where you always try to do your best-except when your friends are watching.
- Teachers deserve a lot of credit. Of course, if we paid them more, they wouldn’t need it.
- Back-to-school sales get me all excited. Of course, pretty much any sale gets me all excited.
- School is very important. Everyone should get at least a high school education--even if they already know everything.
- You know our education system has problems when Hallmark comes out with a new line of "Easy-to-read" graduation cards.
- My kids have everything they need to go back to school—except the right attitude.
- The best part of going back to school is seeing all your friends. The worst part is that your teachers won’t let you talk to them.
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