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Profession Jokes > Waiter Waiter Jokes


  • Waiter, what's the meaning of this fly in my tea-cup?
    I wouldn't know, sir. I'm a waiter, not a fortune-teller.
  • Waiter, there's a beetle in my soup; send the manager here.
    That won't do any good, sir - he's frightened of them as well!
  • Waiter, is this a lamb chop or a pork chop?
    Can't you tell by the taste?
    No, I can't
    Then what does it matter?
  • Waiter, in future I'd like my soup without.
    Without what, sir?
    Without your thumb in it!
  • Waiter, bring me a glass of milk and a Dover sole.
    Fillet?
    Yes, to the brim.
  • Waiter, I'll pay my bill now.
    This $10 note is bad, sir.
    So was the meal.
  • Waiter, there's a fly in my butter.
    No there isn't.
    I tell you there is a fly in my butter!
    And I tell you there isn't; it isn't a fly, it's a moth and it isn't butter, it's margarine - so there!
  • Waiter, how long have you been here?
    Six months, sir.
    Ah, then, it can't be you who took my order.
  • Waiter, I can't eat this!
    Why not sir?
    You haven't given me a knife and fork.
  • Waiter, this lobster's only got one claw.
    I expect he's been in a fight, sir.
    Well, bring me the winner!
  • Waiter, have you got frogs' legs?
    Certainly, sir.
    Then hop into the kitchen and get me a steak!
  • Waiter, does the pianist play requests?
    Yes, sir.
    Then ask him to play tiddlywinks till I've finished my meal.
  • Waiter, my bill please.
    How did you find your luncheon, sir?
    With a magnifying glass.
  • Waiter, bring me a fried egg with finger-marks in it, some luke-warm greasy chips and a portion of watery cabbage.
    We don't do food like that, sir!
    You did yesterday..


More Waiter Waiter Jokes ==> Page     3  

Gifts:

Allheart.com: "Nursing Uniforms is our specialty. AllHeart.com offers Medical Uniforms and Scrubs, Stethoscopes, Diagnostic Tools, Blood Pressure Devices and more at EveryDay Low Prices. Scrubs for men and women are our bread and butter. AllHeart.com's senior management includes over 90 years of experience in pharmaceuticals, health care, retail, manufacturing, and catalog merchandising industries. AllHeart.com also offers a Free 30 Day Walk and Wear Return Policy to ensure customer satisfaction."

Nurses' Station:"The idea for the Nurses' Station Catalog was conceived in 1989. After searching the marketplace in response to customer inquiries, it became obvious that there were no catalogs of this type serving the nursing profession. To be sure, there were several catalogs offering nurse's uniforms and a smattering of professional items. But there weren't any catalogs at the time offering a range of gifts, clothing, professional items, name badges, shoes and scrubs for nurses. It took two years of hard work to gather samples and put a together a catalog of the most unique and high-quality items for nurses. "
Nurses Station P.O. Box 388 Centerbrook, CT 06409-03881


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Last Updated March 12, 2008

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