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Profession Jokes > Engineer Jokes. If you have some that you especially like and you don't see it here. Drop us an email.
Good Choice !! Two engineering students were walking across campus when one said, "Where did you get such a great bike?" The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes, and said, "Take what you want." "The second engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit." The Measure of the Glass To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be. X Marks the Spot There was an engineer who had an exceptional gift for fixing all things mechanical. After serving his company loyally for more than 30 years, he happily retired. Several years later, the company contacted him regarding a seemingly impossible problem they were having with one of their multimillion-dollar machines. They had tried everything and everyone else to get the machine to work but to no avail. In desperation, they called on the retired engineer who had solved so many of their problems in the past. The engineer reluctantly took the challenge. He spent a day studying the huge machine. At the end of the day, he marked a small "x" in chalk on a particular component of the machine and stated, "This is where your problem is." The part was replaced and the machine worked perfectly again. The company received a bill for $50,000 from the engineer for his service. They demanded an itemized accounting of his charges. The engineer responded: "One chalk mark: $1; knowing where to put it: $49,999." It was paid in full and the engineer retired again in peace. Wife or Mistress ? An architect, an artist, and an engineer were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress. The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship. The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because of the passion and mystery he found there. The engineer said, "I like both." Engineer: "Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the lab and get some work done." The Frog and the Engineer An engineer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week." The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it, and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you and do ANYTHING you want." Again the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it, and put it back into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, that I'll stay with you for a week, and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?" The engineer said, "Look, I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog - now, that's cool!" eBay The World's Online Marketplace !!: Are you looking for that hard to find Collectible? A great price on a Car, Truck or Boat? If you are looking for a great price on just about ANYTHING - eBAY's the place to be --- 24 hours a day !! Gifts: Allheart.com:"Nursing Uniforms is our specialty. AllHeart.com offers Medical Uniforms and Scrubs, Stethoscopes, Diagnostic Tools, Blood Pressure Devices and more at EveryDay Low Prices. Scrubs for men and women are our bread and butter. AllHeart.com's senior management includes over 90 years of experience in pharmaceuticals, health care, retail, manufacturing, and catalog merchandising industries. AllHeart.com also offers a Free 30 Day Walk and Wear Return Policy to ensure customer satisfaction."
Nurses' Station:"The idea for the Nurses'
Station Catalog was conceived in 1989. After searching the
marketplace in response to customer inquiries, it became obvious
that there were no catalogs of this type serving the nursing
profession. To be sure, there were several catalogs offering
nurse's uniforms and a smattering of professional items. But
there weren't any catalogs at the time offering a range of gifts,
clothing, professional items, name badges, shoes and scrubs for
nurses. It took two years of hard work to gather samples and put
a together a catalog of the most unique and high-quality items
for nurses. " Visit these Stores and Information Sites JNJ's Department Store JNJ's Book Store JNJ's Music Store JNJ's Health and Personal Care Store JNJ's Electronics Store JNJ's Sports and Outdoor Store JNJ's Toys and Games Store Article Directory BMW Information Would You Like to Receive Great Jokes in
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