Jokes 'N Jokes
Battle of the Sexes and Gender Jokes

• At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" The other replied, "Yes, I am, I married the wrong man."

• A lady inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Husband wanted". Next day she received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."

• The bride, upon her engagement, went to her mother and said, "I've found a man just like father!" Her mother replied, "So what do you want from me, sympathy?"

• If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.

• Wife : You delivered an excellent speech.
  Hubby : Thanks dear, but the audience was full of fools & idiots.
  Wife : Is that why you addressed them as your brothers & sisters?

• My girlfriend told me I should be more affectionate. So I got two girlfriends.

• Personally, I think one of the greatest things about marriage is that as both husband and father, I can say anything I want to around the house. Of course, no one pays the least bit of attention.

• According to the latest surveys, when making love, most married men fantasize that their wives aren't fantasizing.

• The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.

• How do most men define marriage?
  A very expensive way to get your laundry done free.

• Words to live by: Do not argue with a spouse who is packing your parachute.

• My darling wife was always glum. I drowned her in a cask of rum, And so made sure that she would stay, In better spirits night and day.

• My opinions are my wife's, and she says I'm lucky to have them.

• My other wife is beautiful.

• When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

• When marriage is outlawed, only outlaws will have in-laws.

• Why bother with marriage?
  Just find a woman you hate and buy her a house.

• Did you hear about the scientist whose wife had twins? He baptized one and kept the other as a control.

• Wife: The perfect acquisition for any gentleman feeling himself to have excessive control over his personal affairs.

• You will marry into an Indian tribe and become one big Hopi family.

• All marriages are happy--it's the living together afterward that causes all the problems.

• In marriage, the bridge gets a shower. But for the groom, it's curtains!

• Marriage is a mutual relationship if both parties know when to be mute.

• Marriage is a rest period between romances.

• Marriage is an institution--but who wants to live in an institution?

• Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo...

• Man and wife make one fool.

• Many a wife thinks her husband is the world's greatest lover. But she can never catch him at it.

• Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.

Nurses' Station:"The idea for the Nurses' Station Catalog was conceived in 1989. After searching the marketplace in response to customer inquiries, it became obvious that there were no catalogs of this type serving the nursing profession. To be sure, there were several catalogs offering nurse's uniforms and a smattering of professional items. But there weren't any catalogs at the time offering a range of gifts, clothing, professional items, name badges, shoes and scrubs for nurses. It took two years of hard work to gather samples and put a together a catalog of the most unique and high-quality items for nurses. "
Nurses Station P.O. Box 388 Centerbrook, CT 06409-03881

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