Jokes 'N Jokes
Top 10 and List Jokes

• Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.
• You haven't blinked since the last lunar eclipse.
• You just completed another sweater and you don't know how to knit.
• The only time you're standing still is during an earthquake.
• The nurse needs a scientific calculator to take your pulse.
• Your so jittery that people use your hands to shake paint cans.
• You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in.
• Charles Manson thinks you need to calm down.
• Your taste buds are so numb you could drink your lava lamp.
• When you call radio talk shows, they ask you to turn yourself down.
• Your life goal is to amount to a hill of beans.
• You channel surf faster without a remote.
• You name your cats "Cream" and "Sugar."
• You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug.
• You can outlast the Energizer bunny.
• You short out motion detectors.
• Your nervous twitch registers on the Richter scale.
• You think being called a "drip" is a compliment.
• You help your dog chase its tail.
• You're up to four heart attacks a day.
• Your coffee mug is insured by Lloyd's of London.
• You introduce your spouse as your coffeemate.
• You think CPR stands for "Coffee Provides Resuscitation."
• Your first-aid kit contains two pints of coffee with an I.V. hookup.
• You think Columbia would be a great vacation destination!
• You're passing everybody on the freeway when you suddenly realize: you left your car at home!

• Rock and Roll's Most Wanted: The Top 10 Book of Lame Lyrics, Eregious Egos, and Other Oddities
  by Stuart Shea
• David Letterman's New Book of Top Ten Lists and Wedding Dress Patterns for the Husky Bride
  by David Letterman
• The Southerner's Book of Lists
  by Jim Erskine

Nurses' Station:"The idea for the Nurses' Station Catalog was conceived in 1989. After searching the marketplace in response to customer inquiries, it became obvious that there were no catalogs of this type serving the nursing profession. To be sure, there were several catalogs offering nurse's uniforms and a smattering of professional items. But there weren't any catalogs at the time offering a range of gifts, clothing, professional items, name badges, shoes and scrubs for nurses. It took two years of hard work to gather samples and put a together a catalog of the most unique and high-quality items for nurses. "
Nurses Station P.O. Box 388 Centerbrook, CT 06409-03881

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