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Jokes > Humorous Quotes


  • I've made so many movies playing a hooker that they don't pay me in the regular way any more. They leave it on the dresser.
    --- Shirley Maclaine

  • Never try to teach a pig to sing; it wastes your time and it annoys the pig.
    --- Paul Dickson

  • America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room. every time it wags its tail it knocks over a chair.
    --- A.J. Toynbee

  • America is a country where you buy a lifetime supply of aspirin for one dollar, and use it up in two weeks.
    --- John Barrymore

  • Bores can be divided into two classes; those who have their own particular subject, and those who do not need a subject.
    --- A.A. Milne.

  • Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.
    --- Robert A. Heinlein.

  • I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph.
    --- Shirley Temple.

  • When a man goes on a date he wonders if he is going to get lucky. A woman already knows.
    --- Frederick Ryder.

  • They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days.
    --- Garrison Keillor.

  • Those who welcome death have only tried it from the ears up.
    --- Wilson Mizner.

  • You never realize how short a month is until you pay alimony.
    --- John Barrymore.

  • IEconomists report that a college education adds many thousands of dollars to a man's lifetime income - which he then spends sending his son to college.
    --- Bill Vaughan.

  • When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.
    --- Mae West.

  • Whenever I feel like exercise, I lie down until the feeling passes.
    --- Robert Hutchins.

  • I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
    --- Noel Coward.


More Humorous Quotes ==> Page  1  

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Gifts:
Allheart.com:"Nursing Uniforms is our specialty. AllHeart.com offers Medical Uniforms and Scrubs, Stethoscopes, Diagnostic Tools, Blood Pressure Devices and more at EveryDay Low Prices. Scrubs for men and women are our bread and butter. AllHeart.com's senior management includes over 90 years of experience in pharmaceuticals, health care, retail, manufacturing, and catalog merchandising industries. AllHeart.com also offers a Free 30 Day Walk and Wear Return Policy to ensure customer satisfaction."

Nurses' Station:"The idea for the Nurses' Station Catalog was conceived in 1989. After searching the marketplace in response to customer inquiries, it became obvious that there were no catalogs of this type serving the nursing profession. To be sure, there were several catalogs offering nurse's uniforms and a smattering of professional items. But there weren't any catalogs at the time offering a range of gifts, clothing, professional items, name badges, shoes and scrubs for nurses. It took two years of hard work to gather samples and put a together a catalog of the most unique and high-quality items for nurses. "
Nurses Station P.O. Box 388 Centerbrook, CT 06409-03881



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Last Updated March 12, 2008

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