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• Q:  How many librarians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  A:  I don't know, but I can look it up for you.

• Q:  How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  A:  That depends on whether it has health insurance.
  A:  Three. One to find a bulb specialist, one to find a bulb installation specialist, and one to bill it all to Medicare.
  A:  None. They just tell it to take two aspirin and come round to the surgery later.
  A:  None. They only sign the death certificate and phone the mortuary.
  A:  None. They would diagnose depression and prescribe benzo diazapines.
  A:  Only one, but he has to have a nurse to tell him which end to screw in.

• Q:  How many surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?
  A:  None. They would wait for a suitable donor and do a filament transplant.
  A:  Three.  They'd also like to remove the socket as you aren't using it now.

• Q:  How many gay rights activists does it take to change a light bulb ?
  A:  None: The bulb shouldn't have to change for society to accept it.

• Q:  How many politically correct people does it take to change a light bulb ?
  A:  None. "Why should we impose our values on the light bulb ? If it wishes to be a light bulb of no light, we should respect its uniqueness and individuality."

• Q:  How many yuppies does it take to change a light bulb ?
  A:  Two. One to mix the gin n tonics, and one to phone the electrician

• Q: How many Oregonians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  A:  Six.  One to screw in the light bulb and five to fend off all those Californians trying to share the experience.

• Q:  How many sexists does it take to change a light bulb ?
  A:  None. Let the bitch cook in the dark.
  A:  None. They have the girls do it.

• Q:  How many new men does it take to change a light bulb ?
  A:  Two. One to change it and one to hold the baby.
  A:  None. The consensus of opinion appears to be that there is no such thing as a genuine new man, and in any event, the media, who like telling us what we all like, have declared that women don't really go for new men anyway, but instead prefer more masculinity nowadays.

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Nurses' Station:"The idea for the Nurses' Station Catalog was conceived in 1989. After searching the marketplace in response to customer inquiries, it became obvious that there were no catalogs of this type serving the nursing profession. To be sure, there were several catalogs offering nurse's uniforms and a smattering of professional items. But there weren't any catalogs at the time offering a range of gifts, clothing, professional items, name badges, shoes and scrubs for nurses. It took two years of hard work to gather samples and put a together a catalog of the most unique and high-quality items for nurses. "
Nurses Station P.O. Box 388 Centerbrook, CT 06409-03881

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